Political
Javier Mallardi
¡Afuera! — said to a pond, at volume.
$34.00Free U.S. shipping over $50
Garment
Color — Black
SizeSize guide
Left-chest placement — 3.5″ art over the heart, on garment-dyed Comfort Colors blanks. Buttery-soft 100% USA grown cotton on the 1717 tee.
🔒 Secure checkout↩ 30-day easy returns🦆 Ships in 2–4 days
The Duck
The sideburns arrive first, the leather jacket second, the chainsaw whenever it feels like it. He doesn't debate the pond, he lectures it. Ruffled feathers are considered a feature.
Fabric & Fit
- Tee: Comfort Colors 1717 — 6.1oz garment-dyed heavyweight ringspun cotton, broken-in boxy feel from day one
- Crewneck: Comfort Colors 1566 — 9.5oz garment-dyed fleece, ribbed collar/cuffs/hem
- Garment-dyed = every blank is very slightly one-of-one. Like you.
- Unisex sizing — size up for the oversized look
Shipping & Returns
- Free U.S. shipping on orders $50+
- Ships in 2–4 business days from our pond (Las Vegas, NV)
- 30-day returns — unworn, unwashed, un-ducked
Complete the flock
Any 3 tees for $75 — mix legends freely. Discount applies automatically in cart.
Cities
New Yolk City
The duck that never sleeps.
$34.00
Tee
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Athletes
Erling Haaduck
Scores. Sits down. Meditates. Repeats.
$34.00
Tee
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Athletes
Larry Duck
Calls the shot, sinks it, waddles off.
$34.00
Tee
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Athletes
Lionel Quacksi
Smallest bird in the pond. Biggest trophy shelf.
$34.00
Tee
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★★★★★ 4.9 from the flock
★★★★★"Wore it to Thanksgiving. Chaos."My uncle argued with the duck for 20 minutes. 10/10 print quality, super soft.
— Danny R., verified buyer
★★★★★"The left chest placement is genius"Looks like a normal nice tee from across the room. Then people get close. Then they lose it.
— Mariah T., verified buyer
★★★★☆"Bought 3, need 12"The embroidery on the crewneck is legit dense and clean. Only complaint: they keep dropping new ones and I keep paying.
— Alex P., verified buyer
Javier MallardiT-Shirt · Black · S